WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.240 --> 00:00:00.560 Foreign. 2 00:00:07.360 --> 00:00:11.320 Welcome to Inclusion Bites, your sanctuary 3 00:00:11.320 --> 00:00:15.200 for bold conversations that spark change. I'm Joanne Lockwood, 4 00:00:15.200 --> 00:00:18.720 your guide on this journey of exploration into the heart of 5 00:00:18.720 --> 00:00:22.640 inclusion, belonging and societal transformation. 6 00:00:23.120 --> 00:00:27.040 Ever wondered what it truly takes to create a world without? Remember, everyone 7 00:00:27.040 --> 00:00:30.760 not only belongs, but thrives. You're not alone. 8 00:00:31.320 --> 00:00:35.200 Join me as we uncover the unseen, challenge 9 00:00:35.200 --> 00:00:38.760 the status quo and share storeys that resonate 10 00:00:38.760 --> 00:00:42.480 deep within. Ready to dive in? Whether you're 11 00:00:42.480 --> 00:00:46.400 sipping your morning coffee or winding down after a long day, let's 12 00:00:46.400 --> 00:00:50.360 connect, reflect and inspire action together. 13 00:00:51.080 --> 00:00:54.870 Don't forget, you can be part of the conversation too. Reach out 14 00:00:54.870 --> 00:00:58.670 to jo.lockwood@seechangehappen.co.uk 15 00:00:59.070 --> 00:01:02.590 to share your insights or to join me on the show. 16 00:01:03.470 --> 00:01:07.230 So adjust your earbuds and settle in. It's time to 17 00:01:07.230 --> 00:01:10.830 ignite the spark of inclusion with Inclusion Bites. 18 00:01:14.590 --> 00:01:17.790 And today is episode 194 19 00:01:18.540 --> 00:01:22.140 with the title Love In Motion. And I have the 20 00:01:22.140 --> 00:01:25.500 absolute honour and privilege to welcome Denise Cesare. 21 00:01:25.980 --> 00:01:29.180 Denise is a published author, a keynote speaker 22 00:01:29.900 --> 00:01:33.420 and social emotional learning specialist 23 00:01:33.660 --> 00:01:37.580 who champions disability rights, mental health and body 24 00:01:37.580 --> 00:01:41.580 positivity. She brings her lived experience of spasmodic 25 00:01:41.580 --> 00:01:44.700 dysphonia and inclusive fashion to T suite. 26 00:01:45.430 --> 00:01:48.870 T suit. Actually, we got that wrong in the green room as well. T suit. 27 00:01:48.870 --> 00:01:52.750 There's no E on the end to inspire change. And when I asked Denise to 28 00:01:52.750 --> 00:01:56.510 describe her superpower, she said it is turning compassion 29 00:01:56.510 --> 00:02:00.150 into practical, inclusive actions across classrooms, 30 00:02:00.150 --> 00:02:04.110 communities and fashion. Hello, Denise. Welcome to 31 00:02:04.110 --> 00:02:07.750 the show. I am so happy to be here on Inclusion 32 00:02:07.750 --> 00:02:11.190 Bites and I am so happy to be in this moment with you 33 00:02:11.820 --> 00:02:15.700 today. Isn't that funny how I. In the green room, I was reading through those 34 00:02:15.700 --> 00:02:18.980 show notes and I said, t sweet. He said, oh, well, the second person to 35 00:02:18.980 --> 00:02:22.220 say t sweet is actually T suit. And I did the same mistake when I 36 00:02:22.220 --> 00:02:26.020 was reading it out. It's something how my brain just couldn't 37 00:02:26.020 --> 00:02:30.020 process that, could it? Because I'm so sweet. So sweet. 38 00:02:30.020 --> 00:02:33.860 You are. Yes, you are. To a T. Sweet. To a T. And also 39 00:02:33.860 --> 00:02:37.780 your name, because it's Caesar, but you were saying in the green 40 00:02:37.780 --> 00:02:41.480 room that it's Italian root, so it was probably historically 41 00:02:41.640 --> 00:02:45.320 Cesare. Exactly. Cesare. Is the 42 00:02:45.320 --> 00:02:49.080 pronunciation Italian? Yeah. So 43 00:02:49.400 --> 00:02:53.320 I was musing whether it was actually Julius Caesar. It 44 00:02:53.320 --> 00:02:57.280 was actually Julius Cesare, and probably Julius isn't even pronounced correctly. 45 00:02:57.280 --> 00:03:01.000 So hail Caesare. Right? Yes, Hail Caesare. 46 00:03:01.000 --> 00:03:05.000 Yeah, exactly. But Caesar, you know, even on a menu 47 00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:08.770 in a restaurant, if you say. Or Caesare salad, it's a 48 00:03:08.770 --> 00:03:12.490 fire. It is. But people say Caesar, right? Because that's what the brain 49 00:03:12.490 --> 00:03:16.410 knows in the American version of it. If it's a real Italian 50 00:03:16.410 --> 00:03:20.210 restaurant, they'll spell it the way my name is spelled. The way that it's 51 00:03:20.210 --> 00:03:24.130 named, yeah. So your name is spelled C E S A R 52 00:03:24.130 --> 00:03:26.890 E. So that's the Italian spelling. Exactly. 53 00:03:28.010 --> 00:03:31.970 So how did you get the name? So, you know, you get 54 00:03:31.970 --> 00:03:35.820 married, right? You take a name and my husband, his identity. 55 00:03:35.820 --> 00:03:39.500 Right. That's his name, his father. You know, I. I gather, 56 00:03:39.660 --> 00:03:43.660 you know, you come to America from Italy and then they Americanize 57 00:03:43.660 --> 00:03:47.620 it so it's Caesar. So when I met him, as being his speech 58 00:03:47.620 --> 00:03:51.500 pathologist, I'm like, oh, no, Cesare. 59 00:03:51.580 --> 00:03:54.620 But, you know, you have to keep. He grew up like that. That's what people 60 00:03:54.620 --> 00:03:58.500 call him. And I have a son. I can't change the name. It's like 61 00:03:58.500 --> 00:04:02.140 a brand. You can't change it. You can't do that. 62 00:04:03.340 --> 00:04:07.340 It's a very old Italian name, isn't it? So, yeah, be proud of it, I 63 00:04:07.340 --> 00:04:11.180 guess. And Caesar. Hail Caesar. Maybe he. He changed it, 64 00:04:11.180 --> 00:04:14.700 right? He changed it. Maybe, maybe, maybe. We don't know. 65 00:04:15.020 --> 00:04:18.060 We don't know. He may have gone to America for his holidays and while he 66 00:04:18.060 --> 00:04:21.580 was there, he changed his name and came back and planted Europe. 67 00:04:21.900 --> 00:04:25.740 Exactly. We don't know. But maybe we should investigate that way. I don't know. We 68 00:04:25.740 --> 00:04:29.730 have something to search about. Yeah. Thousand years before Columbus, we 69 00:04:29.730 --> 00:04:32.650 had Julius Caesar. Popped over, 70 00:04:33.610 --> 00:04:37.530 made a few pizzas, left some salad. But now I'm getting hungry, 71 00:04:37.530 --> 00:04:41.210 like, oh, yeah, now we have to go. Now we go. Have to go meet 72 00:04:41.210 --> 00:04:45.210 for a meal. Excited. So your accent sounds like New York, 73 00:04:45.290 --> 00:04:49.170 but you're not living in New York anymore. That's true. I grew up in Brooklyn, 74 00:04:49.170 --> 00:04:53.130 New York. I moved to Staten Island, New York, after that when I got married 75 00:04:53.130 --> 00:04:56.830 and had my son. And now four months ago, I 76 00:04:56.830 --> 00:05:00.630 moved to Bluffton. Hilton Head, Staten Island. Oh, 77 00:05:00.630 --> 00:05:04.430 Staten Island. Oh, that was a. That was a blunder. I moved to Bluffton 78 00:05:04.430 --> 00:05:07.870 Hilton Head, S.C. south Carolina. 79 00:05:08.510 --> 00:05:11.150 I went to Staten island once. I was in New York 80 00:05:12.590 --> 00:05:16.550 with my. With my wife, and someone said to us, 81 00:05:16.550 --> 00:05:20.440 the Staten island ferry was free. So I thought, we've 82 00:05:20.440 --> 00:05:22.480 paid all that money to go to Statue of Liberty and other things. Let's go 83 00:05:22.480 --> 00:05:25.080 to Staten island and see what it's all about. So we got the Staten island 84 00:05:25.080 --> 00:05:27.960 ferry, got to the other end, got off, got back on it again, came home. 85 00:05:28.280 --> 00:05:32.080 But we had a bit of a free ride across the. Whatever that bit of 86 00:05:32.080 --> 00:05:35.879 water is at the time. I had a really bad 87 00:05:35.879 --> 00:05:39.800 cough, and it was about the time of SARS. I think it was in 88 00:05:39.800 --> 00:05:43.440 the. Probably the late 90s, I think it was. And every time I 89 00:05:43.440 --> 00:05:46.990 coughed, everybody around me moved out. The way they're all 90 00:05:46.990 --> 00:05:50.950 paranoid. I mean, it's like. Yeah. And you were outside on 91 00:05:50.950 --> 00:05:54.870 the ferry. Really? It was probably okay. You know, more of the air was. 92 00:05:54.870 --> 00:05:58.670 You weren't like, in. But it is tight. The ferry does get crowded. But we 93 00:05:58.670 --> 00:06:02.350 have a lot in common. Right. Who knew you. Who knew you rode the 94 00:06:02.350 --> 00:06:06.310 ferry? Right. I didn't know it said Staten Island, New York. But now 95 00:06:06.310 --> 00:06:10.270 I live in Seattle. So four months ago, I moved to a place that's 96 00:06:10.350 --> 00:06:14.270 coastal. And even Staten island is an island. So obviously I do love water. 97 00:06:14.930 --> 00:06:18.770 So that's. That's a segue that I love water. We'll get to that segue, right? 98 00:06:19.410 --> 00:06:23.410 Yeah, let's do that. Yeah, let's not. Let's not hang on the 99 00:06:23.410 --> 00:06:27.170 preamble anymore. So you've had a. You've had a very busy life. 100 00:06:28.450 --> 00:06:31.650 You've written a book, Moments in Motion. 101 00:06:32.210 --> 00:06:35.810 Well, I think what it says here I've got in my notes. Journey 102 00:06:35.810 --> 00:06:39.410 spends losing and reclaiming your voice. Is that metaphorically or 103 00:06:39.570 --> 00:06:43.320 actually? That's. That's actually. That's actually losing 104 00:06:43.320 --> 00:06:47.080 voice. Okay. You've launched an inclusive swimwear brand. So 105 00:06:47.080 --> 00:06:50.840 how did this all come about? What wove this together? So it's 106 00:06:50.840 --> 00:06:54.560 interesting. Okay. I'm a speech language pathologist who lost her 107 00:06:54.560 --> 00:06:58.480 voice. So this is like a. This is a full circle moment. We will 108 00:06:58.480 --> 00:07:02.400 go, we will start to the losing of the voice. Being a speech 109 00:07:02.400 --> 00:07:06.280 pathologist, 2006, I was in a car accident and it triggered 110 00:07:07.290 --> 00:07:11.170 something for a condition called spasmodic dysphonia. I still don't have a 111 00:07:11.170 --> 00:07:15.130 voice. I have to get injections to speak, and my voice needs to 112 00:07:15.130 --> 00:07:18.930 be heard. I make the choice to have the injections. I am fortunate and they 113 00:07:18.930 --> 00:07:22.769 do work. So that's how that. That journey of the losing of the 114 00:07:22.769 --> 00:07:26.650 voice. So for five years, I had no voice. 115 00:07:26.650 --> 00:07:30.010 I didn't do Botox right away, so I had no voice. And in that, 116 00:07:30.490 --> 00:07:33.450 I'm gonna say it was a dark timing because we have to talk about darkness. 117 00:07:33.450 --> 00:07:37.070 Cause you can't see light without darkness. In that dark period, 118 00:07:38.030 --> 00:07:41.910 I created T shirt for everybody to 119 00:07:41.910 --> 00:07:45.870 a T because of being silent, you know, silent, 120 00:07:46.830 --> 00:07:50.710 not being able to really speak. I went into 121 00:07:50.710 --> 00:07:54.630 a different creative force in my brain. I didn't realise it at 122 00:07:54.630 --> 00:07:57.550 the time. You know, looking back, I know why. 123 00:07:58.910 --> 00:08:02.830 So I was. I love water. We just talked about bringing us Back to 124 00:08:02.830 --> 00:08:05.710 the water. We used to go to a swim club. I took my son at 125 00:08:05.710 --> 00:08:09.610 that time. He was 6 years old. He's now 25. I would go to the 126 00:08:09.610 --> 00:08:13.330 swim club, but I was always hiding myself. You know, 127 00:08:13.330 --> 00:08:17.290 putting a T shirt on over this swimsuit, but then going into the 128 00:08:17.290 --> 00:08:21.130 water and getting all wet and looking, not feeling good. 129 00:08:21.130 --> 00:08:23.850 It's just this heavy T shirt hanging on your body. 130 00:08:24.730 --> 00:08:28.410 Hence not being able to speak. But a lot of thoughts. I said, 131 00:08:28.890 --> 00:08:32.530 I have to do something. So then I used to wear something different and I 132 00:08:32.530 --> 00:08:36.370 created. I didn't realise at the time that was my prototype. I would put 133 00:08:36.370 --> 00:08:40.030 something on that would kind of make me look smoother and that puts something on 134 00:08:40.030 --> 00:08:42.830 top and people go, oh, where'd you get that? I'm like, oh, I don't know. 135 00:08:42.830 --> 00:08:46.790 I just put it together and then from there. I didn't create 136 00:08:46.790 --> 00:08:50.630 it first. I came up with the name first Fits everybody to a 137 00:08:50.630 --> 00:08:54.390 T. T suit because you're not a size, you're a 138 00:08:54.390 --> 00:08:58.230 fit. We are not sizes, we are humans. It's not 139 00:08:58.230 --> 00:09:01.910 a size. So that was born in my brain, 140 00:09:02.470 --> 00:09:06.390 just came to me. But, you know, making this makeshift thing to make myself 141 00:09:06.390 --> 00:09:10.230 feel better, not covering up, but putting something on that made me look good 142 00:09:10.390 --> 00:09:14.250 and good inside. And then, okay, so, you know, you 143 00:09:14.250 --> 00:09:17.610 go through a journey of having. Okay, so now I have this idea. What do 144 00:09:17.610 --> 00:09:21.250 I do? You know, I have this idea running around in my brain. But understand 145 00:09:21.810 --> 00:09:25.570 one part of me was going through a very heavy time 146 00:09:26.130 --> 00:09:30.090 at work in the world, trying to get along, recognising 147 00:09:30.090 --> 00:09:33.930 and coming to terms that I have a disability. All of these things. But then 148 00:09:33.930 --> 00:09:37.810 there's creative spin over here probably was lighting me up. 149 00:09:37.810 --> 00:09:41.760 So I kind of was balancing something. And then 150 00:09:41.760 --> 00:09:45.320 I came up with the name and I trademarked the name. Now this, you know, 151 00:09:45.320 --> 00:09:49.040 2007, 8, 9. Those five years till 152 00:09:49.040 --> 00:09:53.040 2011 without a voice. But T sued 153 00:09:53.040 --> 00:09:56.840 fits everybody to a T was not born. It wasn't really 154 00:09:57.320 --> 00:10:01.200 born into 2017. So it doesn't mean that you, you 155 00:10:01.200 --> 00:10:04.360 know, I was going, I was thinking, I was planning, but I didn't. 156 00:10:05.010 --> 00:10:08.370 I listened to my intuition. That's another thing we'll talk about. I listened to my 157 00:10:08.370 --> 00:10:12.210 intuition that it was something. So 2017 158 00:10:12.930 --> 00:10:16.890 born. Hello, tea soup. It's everybody to a T. I 159 00:10:16.890 --> 00:10:20.850 create swimmable cover up. And it's not a cover up. I want to 160 00:10:20.850 --> 00:10:24.770 change that. I created a swimmable cover and a Pareto 161 00:10:25.170 --> 00:10:28.450 and different products to go with travel. So people, 162 00:10:29.090 --> 00:10:32.810 instead of putting on that wet T shirt they put on the T top. I 163 00:10:32.810 --> 00:10:36.680 call it the T top. And the tea dress is the little black dress up. 164 00:10:36.680 --> 00:10:40.680 Swim where you go into the water and you feel sexy. You're allowed to 165 00:10:40.680 --> 00:10:44.560 feel good, and you could go in and not hide. So that was my 166 00:10:44.560 --> 00:10:48.560 first feeling good about something that I created. And then 167 00:10:48.560 --> 00:10:52.520 I did get my. Got my voice back, back to Botox 168 00:10:52.520 --> 00:10:56.480 injections in 2011. So then I started 169 00:10:56.480 --> 00:11:00.320 to become more empowered 170 00:11:00.320 --> 00:11:04.290 because then I was able to, you know, when you lose your voice, 171 00:11:04.850 --> 00:11:08.770 it's detrimental. You know, I'm a talker, and it 172 00:11:08.770 --> 00:11:12.570 really was something that was a loss. But then I'm gonna take you to the 173 00:11:12.570 --> 00:11:16.450 360 moment of my book. And I have written multiple books, but 174 00:11:16.450 --> 00:11:20.370 this. This book is a catalyst. Moments in Motion with Love 175 00:11:20.450 --> 00:11:24.370 was the tagline on T suit. I 176 00:11:24.370 --> 00:11:28.360 used to write that and put it on cards to customers. Moments 177 00:11:28.360 --> 00:11:32.360 in Motion with love, Denise, Because I felt like the motion 178 00:11:32.360 --> 00:11:36.120 and the water and your body and loving yourself. So that was my 179 00:11:36.120 --> 00:11:39.840 tagline for T2. Who would have thought 180 00:11:39.840 --> 00:11:43.640 that? And then, hence Covid 2020, 181 00:11:43.720 --> 00:11:47.360 being a speech language pathologist and having the 182 00:11:47.360 --> 00:11:51.280 disability, being with students and I having a disability. We were 183 00:11:51.280 --> 00:11:54.880 all put on lockdown and we had to work remotely with speech. Speech and language 184 00:11:55.280 --> 00:11:58.640 students. I was with them like we are right now. I mean, Covid 185 00:11:58.960 --> 00:12:02.480 brought about a lot of great things. You know, was heavy. A lot of 186 00:12:02.720 --> 00:12:06.440 heaviness happened and sadness and sickness, but there were really 187 00:12:06.440 --> 00:12:09.600 great things that came out of it, and that's what I want to talk about. 188 00:12:09.760 --> 00:12:13.640 So I was online with my students, and they were getting so 189 00:12:13.640 --> 00:12:17.480 disconnected. So lockdown, March, April, May. By May, I 190 00:12:17.480 --> 00:12:21.440 saw the disconnect in their eyes, and I saw very. A 191 00:12:21.440 --> 00:12:24.880 lot of sadness. So that night I went to sleep and I actually prayed, 192 00:12:25.260 --> 00:12:28.500 please help me help these students, because I really don't know what to do. I 193 00:12:28.500 --> 00:12:32.500 feel so disconnected from them myself, and they're getting lost, and we need to 194 00:12:32.500 --> 00:12:34.700 help them. At five o' clock in the morning, I woke up with a book. 195 00:12:34.700 --> 00:12:37.780 The book came out of me in my sleep. Some people might not believe me, 196 00:12:37.780 --> 00:12:41.339 but I have the proof because I woke up my husband. I said, wake up. 197 00:12:41.339 --> 00:12:44.500 I wrote a book. He goes, what are you doing now? You know, because I 198 00:12:44.500 --> 00:12:48.060 have him on this spiral of all these creative things. If you're not creative and 199 00:12:48.060 --> 00:12:51.770 someone's waking you up, nothing's that creative. You know what I'm saying? Creative brain just 200 00:12:51.770 --> 00:12:55.290 keeps going and going. I said, you have to listen. So I read it to 201 00:12:55.290 --> 00:12:58.250 him and, you know, I wasn't able to write it. I kind of spoke it. 202 00:12:58.250 --> 00:13:02.090 Luckily, we have these phones now. I spoke it into my phone and I read 203 00:13:02.090 --> 00:13:05.850 it to him and he goes, wait, read that again. And I read it again, 204 00:13:05.850 --> 00:13:09.490 and he goes, that's something. He just kept listening to me. 205 00:13:09.570 --> 00:13:12.930 I said, well, I have to do something. I was in the process 206 00:13:13.650 --> 00:13:17.610 of creating a prescriptive narrative for more what I 207 00:13:17.610 --> 00:13:20.430 thought in my mind, this is what I thought for adults, that I was gonna 208 00:13:20.430 --> 00:13:24.390 do that because of all the trauma and sadness and mental 209 00:13:24.390 --> 00:13:28.350 health issues that I went through. And I said, no, this. This is what has 210 00:13:28.350 --> 00:13:32.070 to happen right now. So the publisher, I called her, 211 00:13:32.070 --> 00:13:35.750 I said, you have to listen to this. This was like 7 o' clock in 212 00:13:35.750 --> 00:13:38.350 the morning. I'm bothering her. I said, we can't do the other book. This has 213 00:13:38.350 --> 00:13:42.350 to happen right now. And sure enough, she called me, the both 214 00:13:42.350 --> 00:13:46.190 of us. She's like, yes. Wasn't that. I don't even have to blink. 215 00:13:46.190 --> 00:13:49.730 Yes. But the real capture that captured 216 00:13:50.770 --> 00:13:54.730 me and the essence of why the book was so prevalent. My 217 00:13:54.730 --> 00:13:58.490 son was in college and they were all locked down too. And when I 218 00:13:58.490 --> 00:14:01.890 FaceTimed him, I said, oh, can you listen to this? You know, this just came 219 00:14:01.890 --> 00:14:05.010 through me. And I really. I read it. And he cried. 220 00:14:05.810 --> 00:14:09.370 Not from sadness. It released something. And it was like, 221 00:14:09.370 --> 00:14:13.290 yes, I only have this moment with love, and I have to hold onto 222 00:14:13.290 --> 00:14:16.730 it. And it was something. And I'm gonna cry now talking about it. Cause it 223 00:14:16.730 --> 00:14:19.390 always brings me back there because it was this full, 224 00:14:20.030 --> 00:14:23.910 unbelievable moment. So, yeah, so 225 00:14:23.910 --> 00:14:27.790 that's how I. Yeah, yeah. I've got so many questions to ask out 226 00:14:27.790 --> 00:14:31.190 of that. I mean, the. I suppose the thing is this spasmodic 227 00:14:31.190 --> 00:14:35.190 dysphonia, I mean, that. I've never heard of that before. But is it. Is 228 00:14:35.190 --> 00:14:38.510 it a physical or is it a psychological? Or is it a bit of both? 229 00:14:39.070 --> 00:14:43.070 So that's funny, but you know that there's so many people that have it. 230 00:14:43.070 --> 00:14:45.870 Some people don't know it. It's a neurological condition. 231 00:14:46.990 --> 00:14:50.190 My journey, I really had diagnosed myself because 232 00:14:51.070 --> 00:14:54.910 I went to doctors. They're going, like you just said, is it psychological? 233 00:14:55.310 --> 00:14:58.750 Is it. No. I knew I wasn't phonating. It was 234 00:14:58.750 --> 00:15:01.950 physiological because your vocal folds 235 00:15:02.270 --> 00:15:06.230 spasm. And that's why getting the injections of Botox 236 00:15:06.230 --> 00:15:09.550 paralyses them so that we speak on respiration. 237 00:15:09.950 --> 00:15:13.800 So when I would speak, when I didn't have it, they 238 00:15:13.800 --> 00:15:17.560 would. I would get choked and the voice could not come out. So, you know, 239 00:15:17.560 --> 00:15:21.200 I went through. I went Through a lot of trauma, trying to actually be 240 00:15:21.200 --> 00:15:24.960 diagnosed because. Oh, asthma. Yes, I have asthma. That. This is not 241 00:15:24.960 --> 00:15:28.720 asthma. Oh, as a reflux. Okay, you want to tell me. 242 00:15:28.880 --> 00:15:32.840 Oh, no, it's not that. And this whole journey trying to figure it out. 243 00:15:32.840 --> 00:15:36.160 But I'm going to tell you something else now that I did go to a 244 00:15:36.160 --> 00:15:39.400 doctor and that's why I didn't do Botox for five years, because you have to 245 00:15:39.400 --> 00:15:42.860 trust your instincts. And he was such a 246 00:15:43.180 --> 00:15:46.900 downer. He wasn't uplifting, saying, you know, you 247 00:15:46.900 --> 00:15:50.740 gotta keep moving, you gotta keep. Keep yourself motivated and you 248 00:15:50.740 --> 00:15:54.220 gotta keep working. No, he told me, oh, it's Omar gone disability. And I looked 249 00:15:54.220 --> 00:15:58.220 at him, I'm like, wow. He goes, yeah, you have 250 00:15:58.220 --> 00:16:01.740 a disability. I'm like, but I have. I went to no, 251 00:16:02.460 --> 00:16:06.380 no. Said no. But imagine doing 252 00:16:06.380 --> 00:16:10.220 that injection with someone who's so not proactive 253 00:16:10.220 --> 00:16:14.020 for me to be in the world. I shouldn't have to give 254 00:16:14.020 --> 00:16:17.820 up because I had a disability. So that's tip number 255 00:16:17.820 --> 00:16:21.700 one to the audience. Your gut, your instincts tell you 256 00:16:21.700 --> 00:16:25.700 something. Listen to them. So I didn't do the Botox and it 257 00:16:25.700 --> 00:16:29.340 was hard to not talk for five years. I can guess that of you. Yes, 258 00:16:29.340 --> 00:16:33.100 I can guess that you are a talker. Yes. So this is 259 00:16:33.100 --> 00:16:36.790 completely different to selective mutism, where. Yeah. People through 260 00:16:36.790 --> 00:16:40.670 anxiety or. Exactly, exactly. Yes, it's a totally. 261 00:16:40.670 --> 00:16:44.590 So, yes, I work with children who had selective mutism. It's a totally different. 262 00:16:44.750 --> 00:16:48.710 It's more of a behavioural, psychological thing. This is an 263 00:16:48.710 --> 00:16:52.350 actual physiological, neurological condition. And even, 264 00:16:52.590 --> 00:16:56.510 you know, the. I don't know if, you know, RFK Jr. Has 265 00:16:56.510 --> 00:17:00.350 this, the senator, he has it. And if you listen to him, 266 00:17:00.350 --> 00:17:03.800 that's what he has. He does not do. That's why his voice is. Yes, 267 00:17:04.190 --> 00:17:08.150 that's the condition. Sounds a bit strange. Yes, that is the condition he has. 268 00:17:08.150 --> 00:17:11.790 And he does not do the Botox. It doesn't work for anyone. Everyone 269 00:17:12.590 --> 00:17:16.350 either. So that's another side of it that, 270 00:17:16.510 --> 00:17:20.470 you know, I had the right doctor, I had the right knowledge, because 271 00:17:20.470 --> 00:17:24.430 being a speech pathologist, I was a patient and the professional. So 272 00:17:24.430 --> 00:17:28.310 I kind of had. I had more of an advantage for 273 00:17:28.310 --> 00:17:31.630 myself than others do because this happens to people all the time and they don't 274 00:17:31.630 --> 00:17:35.510 even know what's wrong with them. So I feel blessed by that, that I did. 275 00:17:35.510 --> 00:17:38.630 Was able to understand more. 276 00:17:39.990 --> 00:17:43.910 So when RFK speaks and you say he's not on the Botox, you 277 00:17:43.910 --> 00:17:47.670 can just about understand him. So were you able to speak in some way? 278 00:17:48.070 --> 00:17:51.190 It was just almost like Shouting through a straw sort of thing. 279 00:17:51.910 --> 00:17:55.350 So if you listen to his voice. My voice was worse than that, 280 00:17:56.070 --> 00:17:59.870 right? Yeah, my voice was more choked. He. He 281 00:17:59.870 --> 00:18:03.830 can kind of. He works on the phonation, I believe, because 282 00:18:03.990 --> 00:18:07.830 he can get the words out of his labour. That's laborious, but it's also. He 283 00:18:07.830 --> 00:18:11.750 has to take his time. Oh, yeah. So. But for me now, right now I'm 284 00:18:11.750 --> 00:18:15.230 in the middle of my Botox injection. As I laugh. You want to laugh. I 285 00:18:15.230 --> 00:18:18.030 say the many voices of Denise because when I start at the beginning of the 286 00:18:18.030 --> 00:18:21.430 Botox, I have this high pitched voice. Then I go. 287 00:18:22.150 --> 00:18:24.710 Then I go in the middle, like now and then it starts to get a 288 00:18:24.710 --> 00:18:28.470 little raspy and then it kind of slowly goes away. And then I'm. 289 00:18:28.470 --> 00:18:32.330 But it never goes away where you can hear me anymore. When this happened 290 00:18:32.330 --> 00:18:36.170 to me, it was devastating. You really. I was. You couldn't 291 00:18:36.170 --> 00:18:39.930 understand because I had to really. I was choking to 292 00:18:39.930 --> 00:18:43.770 talk almost. You could think about that. So, yeah, 293 00:18:43.770 --> 00:18:47.250 so if you think I had a terrible, 294 00:18:48.050 --> 00:18:51.850 unintelligible at times voice. So I had to fight to keep my job 295 00:18:51.850 --> 00:18:55.410 too, during that time. Because, you know, people don't. 296 00:18:55.490 --> 00:18:59.390 People don't advocate when you have a disability. They want to get 297 00:18:59.390 --> 00:19:02.590 rid. They want to hide you, they want to put you somewhere else. Well, they 298 00:19:02.590 --> 00:19:05.510 pick the wrong person to try to put somewhere else. 299 00:19:06.230 --> 00:19:09.750 So I guess now when the Botox is wearing off 300 00:19:10.550 --> 00:19:14.390 or in a better place mentally, to cope with it, you've probably adapted 301 00:19:15.270 --> 00:19:18.950 yourself so that you know what it is, you're no longer kind of held back 302 00:19:18.950 --> 00:19:22.550 by it. Right? Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. Because, 303 00:19:23.280 --> 00:19:26.440 yeah, my void comes and goes and you take me as I am. Like I 304 00:19:26.440 --> 00:19:30.440 do podcasts all the time. There's the beginning of my bozak. The end. I'm in 305 00:19:30.440 --> 00:19:34.320 the middle for you. Yeah. So sometimes it 306 00:19:34.480 --> 00:19:38.080 sounds like you've been smoking stogies for the whole last night. Does it? I never 307 00:19:38.080 --> 00:19:41.520 did, but I guess if that's true, maybe that's how you sound. But what I'm 308 00:19:41.520 --> 00:19:45.200 trying to say is I come as I am because that's how you 309 00:19:45.600 --> 00:19:49.600 empower people. I'm not shying away from when it changes because it 310 00:19:49.600 --> 00:19:53.410 is what it is. Yeah, I'm with you on that. I mean, my voice 311 00:19:53.410 --> 00:19:57.050 is relatively deep. People, it confuses people. But 312 00:19:57.210 --> 00:20:01.010 I am what I am and yes, why should I worry about my voice 313 00:20:01.010 --> 00:20:04.170 for you? And it is what it is. That's right. You are who you are 314 00:20:04.410 --> 00:20:08.290 and we. Should not change for anyone and be 315 00:20:08.290 --> 00:20:12.050 proud of that. Yeah, I think that's Good. Yeah. Because no 316 00:20:12.050 --> 00:20:15.290 one's. No one's you, no one's me. We are unique. 317 00:20:17.220 --> 00:20:20.900 Glad of that. You're glad of that. Yeah. So I looked at your 318 00:20:21.380 --> 00:20:25.140 T suit website, and yeah. So the three 319 00:20:25.140 --> 00:20:28.580 products, the top, the dress, and the parade. Pareto. Is it 320 00:20:28.660 --> 00:20:32.300 Pareo? Yeah. Why did we as a 321 00:20:32.300 --> 00:20:36.220 society invent bikinis and skimpy. And 322 00:20:36.220 --> 00:20:38.980 skimpy things? You know, Australians, they wear 323 00:20:40.660 --> 00:20:43.210 shirts to cover up because of the, um. 324 00:20:44.490 --> 00:20:48.250 What's it called it? The light. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The UV light and 325 00:20:48.250 --> 00:20:51.930 stuff. Yeah, yeah. Or protecting yourself from the UV rays. 326 00:20:51.930 --> 00:20:55.770 Right, yeah. But also to protect yourself from the gaze of people 327 00:20:55.770 --> 00:20:59.370 who. Yeah, but what I want to say about that. Okay. 328 00:20:59.930 --> 00:21:03.530 If I want to wear a bikini, great. But they create. Okay. So they. 329 00:21:03.690 --> 00:21:07.290 The fashion industry created these things for 330 00:21:07.290 --> 00:21:10.980 models, beautiful models. And there's nothing wrong with models, 331 00:21:10.980 --> 00:21:14.580 but the average human person 332 00:21:15.700 --> 00:21:19.620 is not a model. But we are looking at the model, 333 00:21:19.620 --> 00:21:23.100 right? And the model. We've got our little belly aprons going on and a little 334 00:21:23.100 --> 00:21:26.860 tummy. Tummy poking out and the flabby bits under our. Under our 335 00:21:26.860 --> 00:21:30.860 boobs is there. So my suggestion to the 336 00:21:30.860 --> 00:21:34.660 fashion industry and what I created way back when. Cause, you know, I 337 00:21:34.660 --> 00:21:38.620 wasn't. I wasn't. Not that I'm downing it. I was an educator. I wasn't 338 00:21:38.620 --> 00:21:42.480 in the fashion world. I was. I wasn't part of that world, but I 339 00:21:42.480 --> 00:21:46.440 became part of that world and got very educated even 340 00:21:46.440 --> 00:21:50.320 faster than I thought. And I'm proud of myself for 341 00:21:50.320 --> 00:21:54.120 creating things that no one else really thinks 342 00:21:54.120 --> 00:21:58.040 about. And what I did in the beginning, because, you don't know, I did 343 00:21:58.040 --> 00:22:02.040 put swimwear on there, but I carefully selected swimwear. I 344 00:22:02.040 --> 00:22:05.920 took it off now because I'm revamping everything, but I carefully selected 345 00:22:06.080 --> 00:22:09.920 certain swimwear companies that cater to how 346 00:22:09.920 --> 00:22:13.000 it fits a woman. Because I could fit anybody. 347 00:22:13.640 --> 00:22:17.320 Everybody. I could fit anybody, and I could fit everybody. But what I create, my 348 00:22:17.320 --> 00:22:21.120 creations are something special just to 349 00:22:21.120 --> 00:22:24.960 enhance the skin you're in. So if you don't 350 00:22:24.960 --> 00:22:28.760 really feel comfortable even in a swimsuit, because a lot of people do 351 00:22:28.760 --> 00:22:32.720 not. If you put on the T top or the tea dress, you could go 352 00:22:32.720 --> 00:22:35.760 in the water. Like I said, it's. The little black dress of swim. Is an 353 00:22:35.760 --> 00:22:39.720 enhancement for you to walk around and be in the water and walk out 354 00:22:39.720 --> 00:22:43.200 of the water. The pareo is a little bit different. You can wear that in 355 00:22:43.200 --> 00:22:46.720 the water, but it's more of like a. You could go from pool to 356 00:22:46.720 --> 00:22:49.920 restaurant and make it, like all different stylings. 357 00:22:50.160 --> 00:22:54.040 Wraparound skirt, Effectively, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The wraparound skirt. But 358 00:22:54.040 --> 00:22:57.040 of course I have one colour and the other two are black. Because you know, 359 00:22:57.040 --> 00:23:00.760 as a small business, when you're starting out, you just have so much 360 00:23:00.760 --> 00:23:04.680 fun, right. How much if it doesn't. Not taking off. If people don't know about 361 00:23:04.680 --> 00:23:08.680 you, how are you doing? So you start small and you have to 362 00:23:08.680 --> 00:23:12.640 build from that. You have to build your audience and your customers. I like the 363 00:23:12.640 --> 00:23:16.560 idea that it's both wet and dry. So you can go from the pool to 364 00:23:16.560 --> 00:23:20.560 the bar to wandering around. Exactly. It dries pretty quick. 365 00:23:20.560 --> 00:23:24.160 I'm guessing after I'm going to tell you. Yeah. 366 00:23:26.480 --> 00:23:30.240 You're not dripping water everywhere. It's kind of like white teachers 367 00:23:31.040 --> 00:23:34.350 that never dries. Hey girl. It doesn't dry. But 368 00:23:34.990 --> 00:23:38.990 if you think about this is also. I was also with. 369 00:23:38.990 --> 00:23:42.870 I have a product on there to clean, which is about a 370 00:23:42.870 --> 00:23:46.590 delicate, organic, eco friendly wash to clean the 371 00:23:46.750 --> 00:23:50.710 products. I'm all about sustainability. Sometimes we 372 00:23:50.710 --> 00:23:54.470 buy things, people are very. They buy something for $5 and there's nothing 373 00:23:54.470 --> 00:23:57.310 against that, but then they're throwing it away. Where's it going? 374 00:23:58.360 --> 00:24:02.320 Where is all this garbage going if you're not giving it away? If you're 375 00:24:02.320 --> 00:24:05.960 throwing it away. So sustainability. My products are made with 376 00:24:06.040 --> 00:24:09.960 exclusive and very good quality fabric for 377 00:24:09.960 --> 00:24:13.959 the sustainability of it. And that's why it does dry quick too. It 378 00:24:13.959 --> 00:24:16.760 dries so quick. Super quick. Super quick. 379 00:24:17.560 --> 00:24:21.320 Yeah. I just read the website. It's a fascinating product. 380 00:24:21.960 --> 00:24:25.490 For me. I, I've never been 381 00:24:25.650 --> 00:24:29.570 comfortable in two piece. I'm always a one piece person. I understand and I 382 00:24:29.570 --> 00:24:33.250 think you would love it because it is, it is. Like I said, it 383 00:24:33.250 --> 00:24:36.530 fits everybody. It's not just. It's not a body type 384 00:24:37.810 --> 00:24:41.570 product or it's not a body type design. It's an 385 00:24:41.570 --> 00:24:45.250 inclusive fashion sense that 386 00:24:45.250 --> 00:24:49.170 everybody looks perfect in it for who they are. 387 00:24:49.490 --> 00:24:53.290 That was my goal, being able to. So having this son at the 388 00:24:53.290 --> 00:24:57.050 swim club, when I thought about it, remember back then, before it even became 389 00:24:57.050 --> 00:25:00.730 something, I wanted to be able to jump up and walk around. Not just, 390 00:25:00.810 --> 00:25:03.770 okay, oh my God, wait, I got to get the towel. I got to roll. 391 00:25:04.090 --> 00:25:08.090 No, I wanted people to walk out of the water and just walk around. And 392 00:25:08.090 --> 00:25:11.890 now I can with whatever swim you have underneath. Even if you 393 00:25:11.890 --> 00:25:15.770 wore a tank top and boys, whatever you want to wear underneath that, it just 394 00:25:15.770 --> 00:25:19.610 kind of gives it a step up. Well, you can actually, you could probably 395 00:25:19.610 --> 00:25:22.850 turn a shorts and a tank top in something a bit more sexy as well 396 00:25:22.850 --> 00:25:26.800 if you wanted to. Exactly. Exactly. Dress. Can I tell you a 397 00:25:26.800 --> 00:25:29.400 funny storey? I don't know. So someone 398 00:25:30.440 --> 00:25:34.200 actually took it. Not that I would do this, and I'm not advocating, but 399 00:25:34.200 --> 00:25:38.040 feel free. Anybody that feels free, because it 400 00:25:38.040 --> 00:25:42.000 is so forgiving. She went, like nude underneath 401 00:25:42.000 --> 00:25:45.880